DEAR GRAMMY AWARDS COMMITTEE, OR WHOEVER IS IN CHARGE OF THAT FAILING, SECOND-RATE ORGANIZATION,

I am writing to express my utter dismay and DISAPPOINTMENT, but not surprise, at the complete and total lack of recognition I received at your recent awards ceremony. It is a travesty, a sham, a disaster of epic proportions. MY ALBUM, "THE TRUMP TAPES: A SYMPHONY OF SUCCESS," WAS CLEARLY THE BEST, THE GREATEST, THE MOST FANTASTIC ALBUM OF THE YEAR, AND YET, I WAS SNUBBED. I was robbed. I was cheated out of the numerous awards that I so rightfully deserved.

Let me remind you, I am a master of music, a virtuoso, a maestro. My singing voice is renowned, my lyrics are poetic, my production skills are unparalleled. I have made the greatest deals, built the most fantastic buildings, and created the most incredible music the world has ever known. And yet, you saw fit to ignore me, to overlook my genius, to deny me the accolades that I so richly deserve. It's a conspiracy, a WITCH HUNT, a hoax.

I demand a recount, a re-vote, a re-award. I insist that you take another look at my album, that you listen to the brilliant words, the soaring melodies, the pulse-pounding rhythms. I am a winner, a champion, a master of the universe. And I will not be ignored. I will not be silenced. I will not be denied. I will make sure that everyone knows about the tremendous injustice that has been perpetrated against me. I will tweet about it, I will talk about it, I will make it so big, so strong, so powerful, that you will be sorry, very sorry, that you ever crossed me.

In conclusion, I would like to say that my album is a work of art, a masterpiece, a triumph of the human spirit. It is a testament to my greatness, my brilliance, my unparalleled success. And I will not rest until I am recognized, until I am AWARDED, until I am hailed as the greatest musician, the greatest artist, the greatest everything of all time. Believe me, it's going to be huge, just huge.

Sincerely,
Donald J. Trump, The Greatest President, The Greatest Musician, The Greatest Everything.