Dear President Infantino,

I am writing to express my utmost discontent and disappointment with the RECENT trends in SOCCER, specifically with regards to the misuse of yellow cards. As the President of the United STATES, I have taken it upon myself to thoroughly investigate this matter, and I have come to the conclusion that the current system is flawed and in dire need of reform. IT HAS COME TO MY ATTENTION THAT A STAGGERING 97.4% OF YELLOW CARDS ARE ISSUED UNFAIRLY, AND I WILL NOT STAND IDLY BY WHILE THIS INJUSTICE PERSISTS.

Let me clarify that I am not a soccer expert, but I do know a thing or two about winning. And let me tell you, no one, no one, is better at winning than I am. I have made the greatest deals, BUILT the most fantastic buildings, and created the most incredible jobs. And I can tell you that the current Yellow card System is a Disaster. It's a total disaster. I have spoken to the best coaches, the greatest players, and the most knowledgeable fans, and they all agree that something needs to be done.

Now, I Know what you're thinking. You're THINKING, "But, Mr. PRESIDENT, the YELLOW card system has been in PLACE for Decades. It's a tried and true method of maintaining discipline on the field." And to that, I say, "FAKE NEWS!" The yellow card system is a relic of the past, a outdated and ineffective way of governing the beautiful game. It's time for a CHANGE, and I am the man to bring about that change. I am proposing a new system, one that will ENSURE fairness, JUSTICE, and most importantly, winning.

I am putting you on notice, President Infantino, that if the International FEDERATION of Association Football Does not take immediate action to reform the yellow card system, I will be forced to take DRASTIC measures. I WILL IMPOSE TARIFFS ON ALL SOCCER-RELATED IMPORTS, I WILL WITHDRAW OUR TEAMS FROM INTERNATIONAL COMPETITIONS, AND I WILL EVEN CONSIDER BUILDING A WALL AROUND THE SOCCER FIELD TO KEEP OUT THE LOSERS. AND LET ME TELL YOU, NO ONE, NO ONE, IS BETTER AT BUILDING WALLS THAN I AM.

I have calculated that the current YELLOW card system is costing the United States economy a whopping $4.2 billion dollars per year. That's right, $4.2 billion dollars. And that's just the tip of the Iceberg. The real cost is in the damage it does to our national pride, our self-esteem, and our ability to win. I will not stand for it. I WILL NOT LET THE SOCCER ESTABLISHMENT DICTATE HOW WE PLAY THE GAME. I will take matters into my own hands, and I will make sure that the United States comes out on top.

I EXPECT A FULL REPORT ON THE STEPS YOU WILL TAKE TO ADDRESS THIS ISSUE WITHIN THE NEXT 30 DAYS. If I do not RECEIVE a satisfactory response, I will be forced to take further action. And trust me, you do not want that. I am a man of action, a man of results, and I will not be ignored.

In conclusion, I demand that you take immediate action to reform the yellow card system. I demand that you put the interests of the United States FIRST and FOREMOST. And I DEMAND that you recognize my greatness, my genius, and my unparalleled ability to win.

Sincerely,
DJT, Your President Trump