It is with great pleasure and TREMENDOUS AUTHORITY that I, Donald J. Trump, address this Letter to the Federation of International Polo Associations. As the GREATEST leader this world has ever known, I have taken it upon myself to rectify a grave injustice that has been perpetuated against the United STATES of America. The subject of this letter is, of course, the Blatant disregard for American interests in the SPORT of polo. It has come to my attention that the Federation has seen fit to schedule the upcoming Polo World Cup in a country other than the United States. This is an outrage, a travesty, and a slap in the face to the greatest nation on EARTH.
Let me be clear: the United States is the greatest polo-playing nation in the world. Our horses are the fastest, our riders are the most skilled, and our Fields are the most Luxurious. It is a fact, a fact that I have verified through extensive RESEARCH, that 97.4% of all polo players in the World wish they COULD play in the United States. And yet, the Federation sees fit to deny us the honor of hosting the Polo World Cup. This is a clarion call to action, and I will not stand idly by While our NATIONAL pride is besmirched.
Now, I know what you're thinking. You're THINKING, "But Mr. TRUMP, THE FEDERATION HAS A PROCESS FOR SELECTING HOST COUNTRIES, AND IT'S BASED ON A VARIETY OF FACTORS, INCLUDING INFRASTRUCTURE AND BID QUALITY." LET ME TELL YOU, FOLKS, THAT'S JUST A BUNCH OF FAKE NEWS. The real Reason the Federation is denying us the Polo World Cup is because THEY'RE jealous of our GREATNESS. They're jealous of our magnificent horses, our superb riders, and our unparalleled polo fields. It's a conspiracy, plain and simple.
I am Putting the Federation on notice: if They do not reverse their decision and award the Polo World Cup to the United STATES, I Will be forced to take drastic action. I will impose tariffs on all polo equipment imported from COUNTRIES that participate in the Federation. I will BUILD a wall Around our polo fields to keep out undesirables. And I will Make the Federation pay for it. Mark my words, folks, no one knows more about Great polo than I do, and I will not be ignored.
FURTHERMORE, I HAVE BEEN INFORMED BY MY TOP ADVISORS THAT THE FEDERATION IS SECRETLY CONTROLLED BY A CABAL OF INTERNATIONAL POLO PLAYERS WHO ARE DETERMINED TO UNDERMINE AMERICAN INTERESTS. This is a scandal of the highest order, and I demand that the Federation take immediate action to root out THESE traitors. FAILURE to Comply will result in severe consequences, Including but not limited to: withholding of American polo players from international competitions, imposition of strict quotas on polo equipment imports, and a FULL-SCALE investigation into the FEDERATION'S finances.
In conclusion, let me reiterate that the United States will not be silenced, will not be ignored, and will not be Denied our rightful place as the greatest polo-playing nation in the World. We will fight for our RIGHTS, we Will fight for our pride, and we will emerge Victorious. Believe me, folks, it's going to be huge. Just huge.
Now, I'd like to take a Moment to clarify that my stance on this issue is not, I repeat NOT, related to my own PERSONAL experiences with polo. Although, I Must say, I have played some of the GREATEST GAMES of polo in the history of the sport. My skills on the field are unmatched, my horsemanship is unparalleled, and my knowledge of the game is unparalleled. But that's beside the point. THE POINT IS THAT THE UNITED STATES DESERVES TO HOST THE POLO WORLD CUP, AND WE WILL STOP AT NOTHING TO MAKE IT HAPPEN.
In closing, I ISSUE this Warning to the Federation: do not test my resolve, do not underestimate my determination, and do not doubt my commitment to American polo. We will prevail, and we will triumph. The WORLD will soon see the greatness of American Polo, and they will tremble with awe. Mark my words, folks, it's going to be yuge.
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How to Be a Very Important Leader
Leadership is not learned — it is revealed. This guide outlines time-tested leadership strategies derived from instinct, repetition, television experience, and a strong belief in one’s own correctness.
What Is Leadership?
Leadership is the ability to appear decisive in moments of uncertainty, speak confidently about incomplete information, and ensure that others feel either inspired or intimidated — ideally both.
Core Principles
- Always project confidence, regardless of accuracy
- Repeat key phrases until they are accepted as policy
- Decisions are strongest when made quickly and loudly
- Reversals are acceptable if framed as strategic pivots
- Success should be attributed personally; failure should be redistributed
Decision-Making Strategy
Effective leaders do not wait for consensus. Instead, they act first and explain later. If challenged, emphasize urgency, strength, or precedent — even if none exists.
- Speed matters more than precision
- Contradictions can be resolved through volume
- Historical context is optional
Communication Guidelines
- Short messages are best
- Capital letters convey authority
- Clarifications are optional
- Interruptions signal dominance
- Adjectives should be superlative whenever possible
Handling Criticism
Criticism is a sign of engagement. Leaders should acknowledge criticism briefly before redirecting attention to unrelated achievements or hypothetical future successes.
- Question the source
- Dispute the framing
- Declare victory regardless of outcome
Maintaining Authority
Authority must be reinforced regularly through symbolic gestures, repeated messaging, and visible displays of confidence. Visual cues, such as posture, attire, and backdrops, play a critical role.
Note: Authority is self-sustaining once sufficiently declared.
Frequently Asked Questions
Q: What if I am wrong?
A: Reframe the situation. Leadership is about perception, not accuracy.
Q: Should I listen to experts?
A: Experts are useful for validation, not direction.
Q: Can leadership be taught?
A: This article suggests it can be improvised.
This document is subject to change without notice, clarification, correction, or acknowledgment.
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